Friday, September 22, 2006

5 Kilometers with a Fat Man

About two months ago my company announced its annual participation in an even called the "Corporate Challenge". It is a 5k(3.1 miles for the metric challenged folks) run/walk through downtown Atlanta. With over 17,000 participants it is I believe the second largest race in Georgia behind the Peachtree Roadrace which draws roughly 55,000 and is in a class by itself here in Georgia. Anyway, for some stupid reason I decided that I needed to run this thing.

About one month ago I realized I needed to start training or I was really going to be hating life. Running on my treadmill 2-3 times a week over that span I had reached a point where I could set that thing on 5mph (12 minute miles) and not get tired. I didn't try to push it too much but knew in actual race conditions I could do better. My training culminated while in Kansas this week where I ran a 5k in 31 minutes on Monday and 2 miles in 18:30 on Tuesday. With those times turned in, I set a personal goal of 30 minutes for the event held last night (Thursday).

Race day came and I felt ready. I got to work and found my team T-shirt on my desk. Bright Yellow? I know they wanted us to stick out but post-it note yellow? Oh well, I wasn't going to let that dampen the run. I staged with the runners (there was a walkers group as well) about halfway back in the crowd. Once the race started it took me a minute to pass under the actual start banner where I started my stopwatch.

The first half-mile was a chaotic mess! I had obviously started a little further back in the field than I should have because I found myself jogging very slowly and trying to weave through the unthinned pack. Teams and buddies that had started together were running 5-6 people abreast causing those of us that wanted to move forward to really work for it. I quickly discovered that the sidewalk was clear and although it had a few more tripping hazards it was far easier to catch up with the group that was running close to my speed. Finally clear of the mess I pushed it the second half mile to make up time.

They had told us that there was water stations at the mile 1 and mile 2 checkpoints. So to my great surprise I found myself passing the first water station 7:30 into my run. I thought to myself "Perry, you are the man, you are blowing away your goal, hope you can keep this pace..." You can imagine my disappointment when two minutes later I was passing a big banner that read "1 mile". What a mean trick! Oh well at 9:30 for the first mile, I was right on pace for my 30 minute goal and I was feeling good.

The second mile went well. I started passing a few people who had outstretched themselves in the first mile and were now walking. Interestingly, seeing their failed resolve only strengthened mine. I decided then and there that no matter what, I would not stop and walk. I started to hurt somewhere in that second mile but stayed focused on my pace and pushed every time I felt myself slowing. As I passed the second water stand and the 2 mile mark (accurately co-located this time) my watch read 19:00. Somehow I had kept the exact same pace for the second mile as the first.

What I hadn't fully accounted for was the profile of the course. The first mile is mostly downhill, the second is a series of ups and downs, and then the third mile is almost all uphill. As I stared up that long hill I felt the early stages of a side cramp and started to debate whether my earlier promise to myself was premature. Just then, motivation arrived. Two coworkers that had been talking a good game before the race appeared in bright yellow 20 yards ahead. It is amazing what bragging rights can do for the spirit. I pushed past them and told myself not to look back and that they must be on my heals. I felt that psychological push the rest of the way in.

My other commitment to myself had been that no matter what happened, I would sprint to the end. So with about 200 yards to go I picked up the pace. Flying past others who had resigned themselves to the same pace to the finish line I felt like a champion. The harder I sprinted and the more people I passed the more energy I felt. As I crossed the finish line I stopped my watch but couldn't look down. I knew that hill had taken it out of me and I feared I had missed my goal. After a few moments gasping for air and convincing myself I was not suffering either a heart attack or a collapsed lung I looked down... 29:44! WOW! I had done it! Yeah, I had come in probably 500th place but I had met my personal goal despite the slopes of the course. Me, Mr. 236 lb, obese BMI of 32, had done it.

For those of you who know me (and if you are reading this there is a 99.99% chance you fall into that category) you know that this kind of competition is my greatest motivation. I had been running occasionally when I had the time but only when a "race" came on the horizon did I really start "trying". There is a lot to be said for personal goals and striving to be the best you can be.

I did have one other motivation in the last month. As I travel a lot, I can't always squeeze a run in. I flew into Pittsburgh late one night and was on the road to Wheeling, WV with no intention of running that night. Then my wife gave me a call. One of my older brothers had suffered a heart attack and was in surgery. This particular brother struggles with weight issues like myself and has actually developed Adult Onset Type II diabetes. I got to the hotel at 10:20 that night, changed, and ran for almost an hour on their treadmill. My brother is fine, single bypass and some stints, but I know I have the power within me to avoid that fate (or at least decrease the likelihood).

I know this was a long post, but hey it was a long race. My prayer for all those around me is to find your motivation, be it competition, be it health, be it a fitted outfit you have your eyes on, be it a spouse or children, or be it anything, and be the best you can be. Now I am far, far, FAR from perfect and each person has to define what the "best" is for themselves but it is important to know what that is and find a way to get there. This is not just for health of body but for health of spirit and relationships as well. The keys to meeting my goal were preparation (put in the time needed to do things right), consistency (9:30 miles no matter the grade of the path ahead), and plenty of perspiration (keep in mind you may stink for a while but you can always take a shower).

You can now see how spiritual my running is to me, I went all preachy and that was not my intent, sorry guys...

Tuesday, September 19, 2006

The flight attendant that couldn't keep her mouth shut...

On Sunday night I found myself on a little regional jet from Atlanta to Wichita. You know the little 50 seaters that have far too little leg room or head room for a grown man but they cram us in there anyway!?! As I boarded I noticed the somewhat unconventional flight attendant. She was probably late 50's early 60's, silver hair, slightly overweight. Not the standard picture of a "stewardess" even though I know that image is changing. During her pre-flight I picked up on her attention to detail as she told probably told half a dozen passengers that their bags were too big to stored under the seat in front of them and would have to be moved into the overhead. Then she made her way through the cabin and handed out 4 seat belt extension devises (basically to every passenger with a BMI over 35). In two and a half years of flying I have only seen these devises used twice... Then she made her way back to me and told me that my MP3 player had to be stored away until we reached 10,000 Ft. I showed her it was in the off position but she didn't care, it couldn't even be out of its case until we were in the air...

OK, by that point I knew she was different but it was not until her announcements that I started to get concerned. She started with the standard air masks blah blah blah and flotation devises blah blah blah but then proceeded to tell us why she had the first three rows of seats empty. "Ladies and Gentlement, I know that some of you in full rows are eying these prime seats at the front of the aircraft but this plane is what we call a tail-light aircraft. We need to have more of you sit in the rear of the aircraft to distribute the weight more properly over the wing to counterbalance the electronics and equipment in the front of the plane..." OK, that may all be true, but does she really need to announce it to the entire aircraft? Why didn't she just say "Ladies and Gentlemen, you all know what happened in Kentucky last month, it is only by the grace of God that we get this hunk of metal off the ground in the first place..."

The next incident occurred just after we cleared 10,000 feet and the seat belt light went off. All of a sudden we had 5 seconds of turbulence, not horrific, but a good shake that I'm sure would have had my wife's knuckles white were she on the plane. My mind said "wow, that was a nice thick cloud" but no, I was soon set straight as the informative flight attendant let everyone on the plane know, "Ladies and Gentlemen, sorry about that, we just passed through the wake of another jet." Now I have seen Top Gun, visions of us entering a flat spin and Goose dying upon ejection from the aircraft shoot through my head... Why on EARTH would she feel the need to tell us that?

Later, as we were making our final approach into Wichita, the landing gear deployed with the loudest clank I have heard in 2.5 years of frequent flying. One of those moments when you hold your hands out like you are Jeff Bridges as Flynn in the movie Tron. You know you are a user and if you just concentrate hard enough you can pull the broken up Recognizer back into one piece. (If you understood that example with the same clarity I gave it, all doubt of your geekdom has been erased!) The lady then comes over the intercom and it is not what she said but her timing and the way she said it, "Ladies and Gentlemen, the landing gear IS... DOWN... please prepare yourself for landing, its been a pleasure flying with you." If I didn't know better I would have thought she was saying, "Listen folks, our wheels just fell off, this is going to get rough, its been nice knowing you..."

As a frequent flyer, I think I can laugh this one off. If this had been your first flight or you are someone that is afraid of flying, this lady would have scarred you for life... Flight Attendents, even though NONE of you will EVER read this please take the following to heart, ignorance IS bliss, knowledge is not always power, and most importantly, just because it is true, doesn't make it right to communicate. The same series of incidents would have had no lasting impact without the "insightful" comments of a crazy old flight attendant.